Fourteen/ softness

​I wear my vulnerability like a knife

I’m crying my eyes out

on stairways, I’m constantly in a state of strife,

I’m drowning, drowning in this pool of doubt

and I wish you could come back.

You were the loudest feeling I have ever seen,

and now I’m left feeling like an amnesiac,

waving a knife around, crying till I feel clean,

building my soft into an armor,

building my voice into a disguise;

I’m still hiding from us- you were a charmer 

and I loved you, but you’ll be my demise

so here I am- wearing my vulnerability as

a knife, my softness as a disguise, slowly

morphing into someone who has

never known your eyes, someone who’s so pious, her holy

heart would never catch your eye, yes

I have changed- I’m so soft now that I’ll never know your caress,

I’ll never again be in this mess, 

I’m so soft now- I’ll never feel distress.

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