13 of 30/ initiate/ 41

All my life, I’ve been hesitant 

at best, terrified at worst of

new things, because with every

change I imagine myself crumbling

under the glares of the people

who must watch me make a fool

of myself, and all my life,

I’ve been unable to initiate things, 

like I was(am) a doll incapable

of the simplest things, like I 

was a small dog, running away at

the slightest hint of afresh, and 

the truth is habits don’t change 

overnight, I can’t wake up and

suddenly begin to live the way I 

want to, but if under the 

cover of darkness you decide 

to set up an initiation, I guess

I wouldn’t mind, no I

wouldn’t mind at all.

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